Ghosts of Crises Past

What happened to the Illegal Immigration Crisis?
–Is it over? Did the bad minorities stop entering the country and using up all of our resources? Did all those agricultural corporations stop hiring them? Are there no more jobs that Americans are not willing to do? Are Americans now willing?

What happened to the Bird Flu Crisis?
–Is there a cure? Did all the birds die so there are no more carriers? Did Gilead/Roche make enough money from Tamiflu sales so that they don’t need anymore free federal government advertising? Did Rumsfeld get his bonus check from the drug company? What should I do with my Tamiflu? It appears that the expiration date is approaching, so should I go buy some more? Also, I still have spools of plastic sheets left over from the Anthrax crisis.

What happened to the Social Security crisis?
–Are Americans now socially secure so that we don’t need it any more? Has it been supplemented by Iraqi oil revenues? Oh wait. “Iraqi Oil Revenues” – that is an oxymoron, right?

I just want to know when I can stop being scared. Preparedness is costing me a fortune in supplies and therapy.

PS. What happened to the steroids use in professional sports crisis?
–oh yeah. That one is still raging on!!!

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